As I sit here trying to come up with the right words to say, I have Mercy Me’s “Word of God Speak” playing over and over in my head.
I’m finding myself at a loss for words
And the funny thing is, it’s ok
The last thing I need is to be heard
But to hear what You would say
Let me remind you, dear friends, this is God’s story. His characters. His plot line. His details. He is the author. This is not a story about how awesome Jason and Terah are. This is not a story with fairy tale endings. This is a story that God is still unfolding. But let me be perfectly clear. It is all His.
To truly grasp how perfectly God ordains every minute of every day, let me start by sharing what should have been by all human standards. Since making the decision not to pursue adoption for the boys, we have sent our home study out to many, many potential sibling groups. We were turned down by some and have not received responses from many others that we should have already heard from by now. When we finished our home study, we told our social worker that we were pursuing waiting children. We should have been listed as an adoption only resource – meaning we wouldn’t get calls to take on foster children just entering the system. We also should have been listed as boys only.
And then my phone rang.
If you know me at all, you know getting me to answer the phone is like pulling teeth.
But I shocked America and answered my phone.
Little did I know that would lead to our lives being turned upside down.
Little did I know that merely answering that call was an act of obedience to our Father.
A social worker was on the phone asking if we would take in 2 boys and a baby girl. At first, I thought I was being punked. I mean. I shouldn’t have even received that call, remember? And then God started speaking to my heart. “I’m here, Terah. You don’t have to have all the answers. You don’t have to understand. You don’t have to be afraid. I am with you.” God, are you punking me right now? was my immediate thought. I told the kind social worker that I needed to speak with my husband.
I hung up. Took a deep breath. And called J.
I can count on one hand how many times in the last year that I’ve called J’s office and he’s actually picked up.
Did you hear that, friends? Please don’t skim over these details I’m sharing. God is in the details, dear friends.
Within one ring, I was speaking with my husband. I shared about the phone call I just received. His response? He had a dream Monday night that we had a newborn and he wasn’t happy about it. I told him I thought we needed to take these kids. I didn’t know why, but I just felt God nudging us forward. And he felt the same. At approximately 3 pm, I was told 3 kids would be coming at 5:45 pm to live in our home and be a part of our family for an undetermined amount of time.
I started cleaning like a crazy woman.
And then praying. And crying. And freaking out.
Friends, this is God’s story. We are so completely humbled that He has chosen us to play a small part in it. We are overwhelmed by His goodness and His grace. We look at these sweet kiddies and are reminded that only God can get the credit for bringing them into our lives. Because it should not have happened, at least not in man’s playbook.
We have officially had these beautiful babes with us for a little more than 24 hours. And in case anyone else who is crazy enough to go from 1 to 4 kids in the span of 2.5 hours wants to lie to you, let me be honest with you for a minute. I might go completely bald by the weekend. But hey. I have always wanted to shave my head. I think I could totally rock it. But also let me say, it is truly amazing how God has granted us so much love for these tiny people. We are exhausted. But God’s goodness continues to overwhelm.
I want to end by asking you to pray for us. We are clinging to the promise that God’s strength is made perfect in our weakness like never before. Please pray that God would grant us rest – for those who know me, not only do I love my sleep it is necessary for my health on the migraine end. Please pray for our Judder-budder. It is a glorious thing to see how he already has such love for his brothers and sister. I am tearing up just thinking about it. But it is also a difficult transition for him. He has had Mama and Daddy all to himself for the past almost 3 years and now all of a sudden he has to share with 3 strangers. Please pray for 4 year old B. He is really really struggling with missing his Mama. These kiddies know way more than any 4 and 6 year old should have to know, but they still love their Mama. And they just don’t understand why they can’t see her right now. Please pray for 6 year old B. Here in LA, school started last week. These kids are not from our town, so he had to start in a brand new school today. Their little world has been flipped upside down in a very short amount of time. Please pray for peace. And pray for wisdom for myself and J as we try to discern manipulation from legitimate needs/hurts. Please pray that Jesus would be made known through all of this – to the social workers, to the judges, to these kiddies, and to their Mama. We absolutely covet your prayers right now.
And I just could not end this without giving a shout out to our amazing church family here in Lafayette. We are beyond blessed by the generosity of these amazing people – they are giving time, food, clothing, etc. to a family they barely know. We genuinely could not do this without you guys.